How to Find Peace in the Transition (It Starts With a Decision)

The funny thing about transition is that, when you’re in the heart of it, all of you can think about is what it’s going to be like when you’re out of it. 

We think, “Oh, it’s going to be so great when I finally finish X.” or “Everything is going to be so different a year from now!” or “I know that, in time, I’ll be healed and ready for something new.” 

For me, a mixture of all of these thoughts has been floating around in my mind these past few weeks as I both process and work through the pain and confusion of a really unique and difficult heartache and also prepare to step into a brand new adventure in my professional and personal development. 

So, I’m in the middle of this heart transformation and about to start a mind and soul transformation—oh, and did I mention I picked now as the perfect time to start a clean eating meal plan? It’s a great upheaval. A tossing of everything into the air. A spring awakening of sorts.

And I’m truly feeling the full spectrum of emotions. It’s amazing I’m able to carry on a sense of normalcy when one moment I’m grieving and lonely and the other, I’m energized and excited for things to come.

All the while, I’m imagining what life is going to look like six months from now. A year from now. While I certainly know I’ll be facing a unique set of challenges, the view I see a year from now looks amazing. I truly believe that in a year from now, my career will look better and brighter than ever before. My relationships will be stronger and more meaningful. I will be even more in tune with who I really am. There’s so much potential ahead, so much I am setting myself up for, that all there’s left to do…is the work. 

There it is again. A reminder of my Word of the Year: Show Up. I’ve touched on this phrase a few times throughout #theampersandproject and it continues to be a guiding lesson. In order for me to get to there, I need to show up and do. the. work. This year calls for being disciplined and creating solid habits, hunkering down and spilling it all out on paper, and finding joy in the process. 

That last bit—finding joy in the process—is something I’m really aiming for as I move forward, but I’ll be honest: it’s not easy. When something is a process, it implies that it takes time and, more importantly, a great deal of patience. Out of all of the adjectives in the world to associate with patience, joy is probably not the first that comes to mind, but this journey I’m on has already taught me that with patience comes contentment—an unwavering confidence that you are in the right place, at the right time and on your way to something great. And wouldn’t that make you feel joyful, knowing you’re doing everything you can and you’re exactly where you need to be? 

how-to-find-peace-in-transition-through-decisions

Even though I’m in the middle of chaos, I firmly believe I am indeed in exactly the right place at the right time. How do I know? I think I’ve arrived at this point of clarity and confidence simply because I finally made some big decisions. Decisions that were scary and risky and uncomfortable to make, but totally and completely necessary.

During our last call, my coach Rachel said to me, “When you make a big decision, sometimes life floods you with signs that you did the right thing and are on the right path.” And boy, has God and the universe done its part to deliver all the right signs! Between a special prayer, my first tarot reading, and the perfect timing of a mastermind retreat, I heard the message loud and clear that I’m supposed to be focusing on me and my career and my relationship with myself at this time. Deal. 

I’m not alone in this phenomena. We all look for signs before we make decisions, but they often come after we decide to take a step forward in a new direction. My friend Douglas recently captured his experience beautifully:

And maybe that’s the lesson of signs. They have a habit of appearing after we’ve moved, after we’ve chosen. I wanted something to tell me beforehand, and while all of this was there the whole time, it was waiting for me to choose first. It wouldn’t have appeared if I hadn’t. It couldn’t. I had to choose to make the signs happen.
It makes sense, though, if you think about it. The dominos don’t start falling until after you start them. You have to push one in order to set off the chain reaction. 

So, amid the discomfort and the awkwardness and the anxiousness, there is peace in the decision. Because of the decision. There is a deeper knowing. Sometimes it hides, sometimes I come undone, sometimes we crack and crumble, but it’s there. And all we can do is cling to that peace as best as we can. And as for me...it's time to get to work.

Are there decisions that you have been putting off? I know they aren’t easy to make. Heck, they can feel downright impossible. But what if making a decision would unlock a sense of clarity and peace, despite the long journey ahead of you? You got this. I’m here walking alongside you.

What I Learned from Posting a Daily Audio Clip for 30 Days

I DID IT! Thirty days of showing up and recording a daily audio clip are complete! Wow, I can't even believe how much has happened and how quickly #theampersandproject has flown by!

While I'm sure I'll still be processing and reflecting for many days to come, I thought I'd spend my last recording sharing the things I've learned and taken away from this whole experience. It has truly been a fantastic challenge, one that has stretched me but never too thin. So much has happened in the past month and while there were days when I didn't want to hit record and other days when I could barely talk (literally, I've been stupidly sick), it feels really awesome to have thirty days of content to go back to, almost like a living journal! Guys, we're talking TWO HOURS, TEN MINUTES, AND FIFTEEN SECONDS worth of content! That's crazy! That's a full-length movie! 

I'm so thankful for everyone who played a role throughout this challenge: those who inspired me and gave me plenty to talk about, those who listened, those who shared, those who encouraged me. You all made this possible. I'm also happy that in showing up for all of you, I showed up for myself :) 

On to the next thing!

Over to you: What did you think of #theampersandproject? I'd love to hear your thoughts!

The "Burning Phases" of Life Build a Better and Stronger You

Wowowowow. Today is the SECOND TO LAST DAY of #theampersandproject! Whattttttttt. That's insane. Thank you so much for sticking with me.

Today's clip will sound noticeably less nasal-y (though still not 100% back to normal), PTL. It's also a lot more encouraging and positive than yesterday's. :) In this clip, I talk about the "burning phases" of life and how when things fall apart, they allow for the opportunity for things to come back together better and stronger than before. Take heart, my friends. I know it's been a long winter and we still have a ways to go, but we're just growing our roots below the surface!

"Try to take heart in the fact that part of the organic cycle of life is things falling apart before they come back together. We go through our own 'burning phases' in life; sort of like how wildfires burn everything to the ground, which makes the earth more fertile and capable of growing." - Rachel East, Clarity on Fire

Over to you: Looking back, what moments of "falling apart" led to growth or something even bigger and better than before?

I'm not okay today. That hasn't always been easy to admit. 

Get caught up on the days of #theampersandproject you missed here! Only two more days left after today!

Today's clip is a doozy. Between being sick, lamenting the state of our country, and struggling with my personal relationships, I am not doing well. I can admit that now, but it wasn't always so easy. I imagine I'm not alone in that feeling, so today's clip is for you.

Over to you: Take care of yourself :) Nothing to answer or do today. Just do me a favor and be kind to you. 

Putting off a project? It may actually be a sign of misalignment, not procrastination.

It's the final countdown! You can check out all of other clips from this 30 day challenge here!

You can tell I'm nearing the end of this challenge (and that I'm sick and dealing with some personal challenges) because not only is my voice starting to sound like a man (it's really cute), but my posts are getting shorter and shorter. But I promise you that I'm still showing up each day as best as I can. Thank you so much for being along this journey with me. It's been the constant in a very chaotic time.

I know I've spent a lot of this challenge talking about taking action on those ideas that you have. But sometimes, it's not because you're lazy or unmotivated or scared or too "busy." Sometimes ideas are left unpursued because they no longer align with your values and how you want to spend your time and energy. Have you experienced this kind of resistance before?

Mentioned: Erica Midkiff's free Intentional Writing Guide

Over to you: Is there an idea that you've wanted to pursue but can't seem to get off the ground and you haven't figured out why? Spend some time writing and reflecting on the why behind the idea. Does it still align with who you really are and what you really want to do? Be honest with yourself! It's okay if it's changed.